Open road, off into the horizon.
It's not that simple is it ?
I'm doing a Feng Shui New Year.
No work today as to insure a year not quite so hard to bear.
It's easier said than done.
However I've managed with the help of some of my transitory movies.
I've been to France, twice, today.
Thanks to Woody Allen
Midnight In Paris and Magic In The Moonlight.
Beguiling films with a magical quality to them.
I skipped Blue Jasmine, too real life for me today.
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| The gardens are lovely in this film |
I've gone to India and The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel.
I love Dev Patel, his energy is refreshing.
Reminds me of Mr. Reeves in a bygone age.
He no longer shows it to the outside world.
Private.
I think that describes him appropriately.
I understand the need for privacy.
I enjoy the benefits of being anonymous.
Others may think fame something to aspire to but if they were to think it through I wonder how many would actually seek it.
You lose so much of yourself.
I put a new video on YouTube and was disconcerted to find that Vogue had been noticed.
I'm not used to being noticed.
I see where no good may come of it.
It makes me self conscious and that is not an appealing character trait.
I like being on the outside of the party observing those less inhibited.
I marvel at the way they can put themselves out there with no fear of recrimination.
I prefer being on the other side of the camera.
My motives have always been questioned.
I'm not really sure why but I tend to bring out a competitive side to people.
People are suspicious of those who actually listen to what they have to say.
The world has become quite superficial.
I suppose it's fair to believe everyone has an agenda.
Genuine interest seems to be passé.
Back to my Feng Shui Year.
You're supposed to imagine the life you dream about.
Which is cool but if you receive all you dream about, what then ?
I think I'd like to find out.
How does a person who's been contained for so long let go ?
How do you allow the most private of thoughts to be seen and scrutinized ?
I wish I had someone to trust.
Unfortunately I've never known anyone I could.
I've had trust issues dating back to my childhood so it would be nearly impossible for anyone to conquer them. People don't want to work that hard.
I think deep down even the most cynical of us wants to believe that there's that one special someone who knows them, all of them, good and bad yet be able to see love light shining in their eyes when they look at you. Every time they look at you.
Now in all honesty is that asking so much ?
I'm not a words person, I don't want you to tell me what I want to hear.
I like people who take action but no credit.
It's rare, I think it's what I find so attractive about them.
It's why I can't quit Keanu.
He gives hope that some where, out there, they do exist.
A good man.
I'm going to do a video, one of my private ones, yes one of those, so embarrassingly shameless no others may be allowed to see.
I will let you hear the song I'm using.
The rest I shall leave to your imagination.
I'm watching Beautiful Creatures next.
I love it when Ethan asks Lena why she would ever want to be normal.
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| My favorite scene is when Ethan helps Lena up onto the wall It seems like such a natural gesture |
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| The only people who stay here are the ones too stupid leave or too stuck to move |
Lena loved Ethan enough to release him.
He loved her enough to find his way back to her.
Does love transcend all ?
Well if it doesn't then what is there to believe in ?
Of course we always have the films that capture it for us, flawlessly.
For that I'm blessed.
Curse Of The Golden Flower is next although I find it beautifully heartbreaking.
Maybe what I need is a good old fashioned break down weeping collapse.
I've got movies for that as well.
A couple of glasses of wine, soft lighting, amber incense and put in Big Fish.
It never fails to break me down.
Have a good cry, get the poison out.
Label it a purge.
Then I'll burn some sage and call it a day.
